“Scent of a Penis”: French Artist Prankster Stephane Berard’s Penis Perfume Joke is No Joke, or is It?

If they can make a parfum de vagina, then why not an eau de cock? I can’t find too much info about Stephane Berard’s “Arome Saveur Penis” that is to say, a liquid that is supposed to taste like penis. Unlike the silly vagina smell in a bottle, though, I think this one has way better potential and according to my preliminary research the artist tried to market it sell it to various condom manufacturers who didn’t bite (pun fully intended). But I really do think this is a great idea. Really the logic is simple. The only way you’d want to put some kind of flavour on a condom is if you were going to wear a hat for a blowjob, you know, safe sex and all, and with the”flavoured condoms” flavours usually being something insane like kiwi fruit or mango, let’s think long and hard (pun intended again) about how many penises smell like tropical fruits? Then again, since I’m assuming the majority of ‘blowjobs with condoms’ only occur between prostitutes and johns, perhaps disguising the scent of a penis with a tropical fruit smell is actually preferred.

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Japanese Men Prefer Facials to Vaginal Ejaculation

Don’t believe everything you read in Mainichi Daily News, but according to this article, an increasing number of Japanese men are experiencing an inability to ejaculate inside the vagina and suffer from what they’re calling “vaginal ejaculation disorder.” This is attributed to a number of reasons, including porn, and “unnatural methods” of masturbation. “”Tsueno Akaeda, a doctor who runs a clinic in Tokyo’s Roppongi, agrees with urologist Nagao.

“There are definitely more people with vaginal ejaculation disorder than there used to be,” he says. “There has been incredible progress made in masturbation goods and there are plenty of people who can ejaculate into an artificial vagina, but not the real thing. I get more than a few men come to see me about that. And those in their 20s and 30s have grown up watching adult movies. They find masturbation easier and more satisfying than intercourse.”

Perhaps the government should put a ban on the Fleshlight?  In the meantime, enjoy the facials while you can.

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“Love Me, Love My Doll” aka “Guys and Dolls” BBC Documentary About the Men Who Love RealDolls and Live With Them

For some reason it comes up as “Guys and Dolls” on the internet but the original title of this BBC Documentary about RealDoll owners who fall in love with their very expensive masturbation devices is “Love Me, Love My Doll.” Ever wondered what RealDoll owners are really like? Now you can find out, because it looks like someone Tivo’d the flick and put it up online. The guys include some oddball Goth looking Black or Indian dude who lives with his RealDoll and with his parents (!), a very pathetic English guy who takes his doll with him when he goes hang-gliding (there’s actually nothing wrong with him but he seems to have both impossibly high standards for the type of women he wants to date as well as an incredibly defeatist attitude), a scary redneck from Virginia who’s really into guns, and a guy who tries to share his collection of 10 (TEN!) RealDolls with his girlfriend.

After reading about this on Sex and Blogs, I couldn’t stop watching it. It is literally like watching a car accident or train wreck. Not only is it a stellar documentary but the subject matter is at once so weird, so sad, so funny and so horrifying, I haven’t seen anything like this in a long time. Must be seen to be believed, really. The video is 45 mins long but I guarantee you will be glued to it.

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The Condom Bag Makes a Handy Tote For Going to the Orgy or Gangbang

I think this “Safe Sax” condom bag, while intended for yet another AIDS awareness shtick of some sorts is a bit of a misguided statement. I mean, do you really need to advertise that you’re going to need that many this evening?

Of course if you’re going to one of the orgies at Party Hardcore, you might. I’m still trying to figure out what the ratio of amateurs to pros is at these parties. Believe me, some are definitely amateurs. A bit frightening and titillating at the same time, eh?

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Sweeties: The RealDoll Rental Service

Let’s say you’ve always been fascinated by the RealDoll and want to try it but don’t want to shell out the thousands of bucks for one. You’re in luck (sort of). A San Francisco based company called Sweeties, provides just the service you’re looking for. For a modest fee you can rent one of the life sized sex dolls and give her a whirl.

Of course, the very first thing that pops into one’s mind is, ‘how clean is it’? Well if you check out the FAQ you’ll piss your pants. First off,

Q: How often do you clean the doll and how do you keep it in sanitary condition?
A:The dolls undergo a thorough clean up after every single play with our special disinfectant cleaning kit.

I’m not convinced but okay…

Q: What is NOT allowed to do with the doll?
A: We WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY IMPROPER OR VIOLENT behavior towards our attendants or the doll. When playing with the doll be gentle even if you feel like “playing hard”. Avoid clumsy positions with doll where there is a risk of doll’s damage.Also any of the following constitutes as damage to the doll: fingernail marks, bite marks, and cuts made with a knife or other bladed instrument; burn marks; liquid other than lotion; excessive bending of the doll’s joints; dirty or torn clothing; a dirty head; semen anywhere on the dolls body parts or entries, handcuff marks. You are fully financially responsible for any damages you wil cause by improper handling. Note: We require that you WEAR A CONDOM at all time when entering the doll’s entries. The previous list is not definite and we reserve the rights to asses fees if needed. The amount of “Loss and Damage Policy Fees” are determined on a case by case basis.

There goes that idea. And here’s what did it for me:

Q: Can I ejaculate on the doll’s surface or inside her entries?
A: We strongly encourage you to ejaculate inside the condom you are required to wear at all times when entering pleasure entries. However, if you have a strong desire to do so, you may, but please be aware we will assess a “Clean-Up Fee” if you don’t return the doll back as as it was when given to you.

OK so not only do you have to wear a condom you can’t cum inside her or on her face. And I really don’t trust their special cleaner too much. What a riot!

“Clean-Up Fee” is assesed if the doll is found in inapropriate sanitary condition for collection. “Clean-Up Fee” is $100.

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What’s the Porn Capital of the World? Prague, LA, Sydney, Melbourne or… Portland, Oregon?

It’s been well stated by Paul Markham, producer of outstanding porn, mostly in the teen and lesbian niche that Czechia (yes, they’re trying to change it from Czech Republic to ‘Czechia’) is a pornographers paradise because Czech girls are not only gorgeous but they love sex (and they’re broke). Then there’s LA, longtime standby which probably produces more porn in the suburbs collectively known as the San Fernando valley than any other place on earth. This was after taking over from San Francisco in the late 1970s. But a lot of LA based porn as you know is the old bump & grind.

Then there’s Abby Winters of course, with bases in Sydney and Melbourne, one of my absolute favorite sites that I’ve been a member of for years because it’s completely natural and highly erotic and actually, I feel like their stuff keeps getting better and better, even though it’s hard to improve on perfection.

And then there’s the intrepid and extremely talented creator of some of the hottest amateur porn I have ever seen, the anonymous genius behind amateur truth or dare orgy party game site Dare Ring and his or her brand new creation, Sell Your Sex Tape. Thing is, they’re based in Portland, Oregon. Could they be part of the porn revolution to make Portland, of all places, the next porn capital of the world? Wait and see, but check out Jenna and Albert from Sell Your Sex Tape first.

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The Condom Fashion Show (Project Cumway?) and Other Good and Bad Ways to Promote Condom Use in Places Like South Africa

I think this fashion show in China was actually sort of clever and the designs are pretty cool. Will it make Chinese use condoms more to prevent overpopulation and AIDS? I’m not so sure.

Here’s an article with more pics. It reminds me a bit of how South Africa always tries to come up with idiotic new ways of getting people to use rubbers to tackle their AIDS problem, the worst one in the world. One was sending out a letter from the government explaining that you need to use condoms not to catch the bug and enclosing a sample rubber. Sounds decent enough, right? Maybe if they didn’t staple the condom to the letter. (I’m not joking, look it up).

Or this, voted “the Most Beautiful Object in South Africa. It’s a “condom applicator.” Jeez, like do you really need one? No offence to my SA friends but I associate this with the African sense of entitlement and macho superiority. “I can’t put this on, my china. I’m African, and until I’m delivered a special device to put this thing on my dick, it’s bareback or nothing.” “Jawelnofine, let’s do bareback.” Ironically the expression “china” is SA speak for ‘my friend’ or ‘my dear.’

In abit of a redux mention, I think the coolest AIDS prevention stuff came in the series of French PSA’s by then absolutely brilliant animation director Wilfrid Brimo which I’ve mentioned before and the messages is pure and simple: “vivez assez longtemps pour trouver le bon.” There’s a straight one, a gay one and one about a pervert like yours truly. The first two are bittersweet, the straight one, a bit more so:

But the gay one is actually a little more humorous.

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Some Additions to the 2 Girls 1 Cup Toilet Humour

I’m assuming that most of my readers are familiar with the coprophagic video “2 Girls 1 Cup” that became, yes, an internet sensation. Of all the things to start an internet sensation, eh? Have we sunk that low? You bet. In an era when “ass to mouth” porn is about as ubiquitous as a shaved pussy, it’s only natural that viral videos that are intensely disgusting gather more attention than either good porn, or even matters of interest. I think 2 Girls 1 Cup even superceded the infamous Goatse. Having said that, while I couldn’t stomach watching the original 2 Girls 1 Cup video, and it seems to be removed from the net, the reactions to it are fairly funny.

Exhibit 1:

A North Carolina State University student recently purchased a customized NC license plate to commemorate one of the most recent and most disgusting viral videos on the Internet. The plate, which was originally opened and questioned by his mother, will soon be driving around the streets of Raleigh.

Exhibit 2:

For anyone who has even taken one film studies, women’s studies, or an art class in criticism, this is rather funny - a college paper analizing 2 Girls 1 Cup as if it were the latest masterpiece from your favourite bullshit artist du jour. I’m disappointed they didn’t throw in a reference to Michel Foucault. On the other hand it also could be a real paper written by “existentialist porn star” Sasha Grey for Film Studies 101. (Clicking pic will open up a larger, readable image).

Via Odd Culture.

By the way, since I mentioned “ass to mouth” did you know that just several years ago, this was a rarity? Check out this article, and this is from AVN (Adult Video News) of all places where the writer expresses his repulsion over “ATM” and this was written just four years ago! Now it’s all the rage. To paraphrase Dostoyevsky, people will get used to anything, the fuckers.

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No Pants 2K8, the Bottomless Subway Ride; and Some Naked Australians From the Abby Winters Pool Girls

While I appreciate the idea of the Annual “No Pants” subway ride, I’m a bit at a loss as to why they hold in JANUARY, in places like New York, Portland, and Chicago for Crissake! Maybe so that the sub-zero temperatures will prevent the hardons that would lead to frottage? Who knows. Check out some of the pics and vids on Improv Everywhere, for scenes from New York:

Portland:

San Francisco:

Now, if you want, check out some NAKED girls from Portland, naked couples from Portland and some naked New York girls.

They also had the event in Adelaide, Australia where it’s summer now, of course which makes a lot more sense not only because it’s warm but because as far as I know, everyone in Australia is always naked anyway!

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Leonard Nimoy’s Nude Photography of Fat Chicks Prove He Really is From Another Planet

I’m not a huge Star Trek fan but I always knew Leonard Nimoy was insane. Or at least he was definitely half-Vulcan in real life. If you didn’t think that his Yiddish Theater experience was at odds with his other planetary romps, or if you didn’t find his horrible music and records (supposedly he has made more recordings than the Beatles) to be enough, here’s another bit of insanity. Not only has Nimoy been a longtime nude photographer, he also loves fat chicks! Check out his “Full Body Project“, dedicated to the art of obesity!

Now don’t get me wrong. I like women with meat on their bones but this might be too much for me. And it only adds to the general insanity of Nimoy. Now, I’m not sure if he’s come out and said anything about that genre of fan fiction by Star Trek fans called Slash Fiction that tries to invent stories & create artwork based on a hypothetical gay romance between Spock and Kirk.

Tak sa mycket to Sex or Not, for alerting me to this madness.

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Alaska Air’s Gay Travel Promotion is Getting Some Heat - But How Do You Prove You’re Gay?

Well it looks like Alaska Air has gotten some slack lately for offering a 10% air travel discount to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered travelers, in their own words “taking diversity to the sky.” People were a bit upset about it by saying that instead offering a discount to gays, lesbians, etc. it was in fact adding a 10% surcharge to heterosexual passengers. Personally, I don’t understand that logic. You can read up about the whole thing here, and also check out their gay travel page itself. But really what I understand even less is, how do you prove you’re gay in order to get the discount? That’s when the penis tatoo comes in handy, of course!

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Nerd Porn or Nerd Pron, Hell, Call it Nerdpr0n 2.0 if You Fancy, it Kicks Ass!

Nerd Porn? Yup. That’s what Anna, self-described nerd calls her solo girl site, “Nerd Porn”, and it’s pretty damn exciting. I always thought nerdy chicks were hot. Seriously. So thank God that there’s nerd porn out there. This young blonde with a terrific ass who’s into all those nerdy things I struggle with, like computers for starters, is not just a self proclaimed nerd but also a self-proclaimed exhibitionist who loves to dress up in Star Trek costumes, read comics and study Unix almost as much as she loves to get naked on webcam, and shoot videos and photos of her playing with her girlfriends, masturbating with or without toys, sucking her boyfriend’s cock and getting fucked by a strapon! This is the real Revenge of the Nerds, homemade porn style! Love you, Anna!

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Russian Schoolgirls Dressed Up as Porn Chicks or Russian Porn Chicks Dressed Up as Schoolgirls? Which is it?

Russian weirdness du jour: Russianmania blog writes that one of the trends in Russia now is to wear the old Soviet style schoolgirl uniform on your graduation day, which “makes them look like naughty French maids” and that the graduation day usually involves lots of alcohol and jumping into the fountain. Frankly this is pretty pervy, I think, because it looks very obviously sexually charged, which is great for dirty old me like myself. I could have sworn I’ve seen Masha in one of those uniforms before and if I find it in my porn collection, I’ll be sure to post it.

Of course this gets the mind working, wondering what goes on later, as the drinking progresses, maybe something akin to this lesbian trio?

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The Most Shocking Photo You’ll See in LA? I’m Not Shocked, it’s Just Buck Angel, the Man With the Pussy!

Laist.com wrote just a few days ago (too bad I missed it), about a recent art opening in Hollywood, which featured “the most shocking photo… yadda yadda…” No it’s not GG Allin come to life (although considering GG’s miniscule penis, this man with a pussy sure could be a dead ringer, so to speak). It’s just Buck Angel, “the man with the pussy”, and popular Female-to-Male (FTM) transsexual porn star. Different strokes I suppose, but few things shock me, although I’ll admit that when I first saw a photo of Buck, years ago, I almost had a heart attack because in my ignorance and surprise, I thought this was actually a GUY who lopped off his penis. Silly me.

Buck has been keeping busy lately, and good for him/her, recently completing another epic motion picture, Buckback Mountain!

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Nyotaimori is Eating Sushi Off a Naked Girl

Nyotaimori (Japanese: 女体盛り, “female body presentation”), often referred to as “body sushi”, is the practice of eating sashimi or sushi from the body of a woman, typically naked. This sexual fetish is a subdivision of food play. As a result of being served on a human body, the temperature of the sushi or sashimi comes closer to body temperature, which some may see as a disadvantage or a benefit.

Before becoming a living sushi platter, the person is trained to lie down for hours without moving. She or he must also be able to withstand the prolonged exposure to the cold food. Body hair, including pubic hair, would also be shaved as a display of pubic hair may be seen as a sexual act.

Before service, the individual would take a bath using a special fragrance-free soap and then finish off with a splash of cold water to cool the body down somewhat for the sushi.

In some parts of the world, in order to comply with sanitation laws, there must be a layer of plastic or other material between the sushi and the body of the woman or man. Wrapping a naked person in cling film may also be regarded as a form of fetishism.

Even less common, but not unheard of, is the practice of using a male model for the same purpose, this would be called 男体盛り, nantaimori. Another variation of the human platter is the “bondage sushi bar”, which can be found in some BDSM conventions and play parties in Britain and in Europe. In this variation, the individual acting as a living sushi plate is tied up to hinder movement or prevent it altogether. Nyotaimori could be considered a form of erotic humiliation.

I think I need to add a new category for “weird Japan” because those people never cease to amaze me. Although I’ve heard of the concept of eating sushi off a naked chick before, here is a video of it in action.

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